THE BOOK THAT HELPED ME BE A BETTER PARENT


Considering my eldest came home from school with a 3 warning blue slip yesterday I am giggling a little at my nerve of posting about parenting *insert hand on forehead emoji*

None the less, this little quote is the very essense of why Spinifex and Co was created so it feels kinda relevant to me/us.

As a busy mum helping run our rural business with two under 2, I was completely isolated, firstly geographically and secondly emotionally.  Also not having internet was quite inconvenient for all of those parenting google emergencies like "how many times a day is too many times to yell at my child?"

Yup, parenting for me was like picking my way through a dark room with a floor full of lego, I ran with my gut without a parenting book in sight......

Until I was given a book that would change the way I viewed my kids behaviour and strengthen our connection for years to come (and it is still something I constantly come back to).

"The Five Love Languages of Children" - By Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell

Just like adults our kiddos also have a love language (fancy that).

But for a long time, I had no idea and I spent so much time pouring what I thought was love into my kids that I didn't even realise I was completely missing the mark - there frustration told me otherwise.

After a few long strolls down the long dusty airstrips in the East Pilbara, with the 5LFC audio book downloaded and pushing a kid with each hand, I listened intently, word after word, coming to the realisation that my kids had been missing out on feeling loved in the way they fully understood.

Now, to be honest, the youngest was lucky, his love language is physical touch and while neither kids missed out on solid cuddles and kisses time, it was the eldest that had a love language that had not been fullfilled.

Quality time *once again, insert hand on forehead emoji* my gosh, who has time for quality time when you have two under two and running a business?  As I slowed my step I burst into tears realizing that he, the one who had made me a mum, had completely missed all of love I was trying to show him.  

His frustrated, irreconcilable outbursts at bed time (or sometimes in the middle of the night) showed there was a huge gap in our communication and he needed some lovin in his own language, so now, with the tools to fix it, I was able to get to work right away.

When my husband returned home late that night we had "the chat" to hire someone to replace me in our business, I started Spinifex and Co (a happy mum was a good start) and there was a lot more one on one time for that boy. 

It has been my mission since the day they were born to create an environment that would mold these kids to perceive the women in their life with respect and emotional stability.  While learning how to love them individually was the starting point in having that deep connection with them, Spinifex and Co has played such a huge role in keeping environment alive.

Kayde x

                             (wearing our much loved Audrey Dress )

 

 


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